First five minutes
- Do not try to explain everything during shouting or blame.
- Write down the one thing you most need them to understand.
- If home feels unsafe, contact a trusted adult outside the home.
What it can feel like
- Feeling brushed off, dramatic, attention-seeking or less important than someone else.
- Hiding your feelings because the reaction feels worse than silence.
- Feeling guilty for needing help.
Why it can happen
- Parents may be stressed, scared, misinformed, dismissive, controlling or focused on another crisis in the family.
- That may explain the situation, but it does not mean your feelings are unimportant.
What can help
- Choose a calm moment and use one clear ask rather than the whole story at once.
- Use outside support: school safeguarding lead, GP, counsellor, youth worker, relative or trusted adult.
- If you are dismissed after mentioning self-harm, suicidal thoughts or abuse, tell another safe adult.
Free support options
- YoungMinds has guidance for family problems.
- Use urgent support if you cannot stay safe.
Important note
This guide is for education and signposting. It cannot diagnose you or replace care from a qualified professional. If you feel at risk, seek urgent local help.
Keep exploring this safely
These connected guides may help you understand the next layer of what you are feeling.
Questions people ask
What can I say when my parents do not listen?
Try: I am not trying to cause trouble. I am struggling and I need you to listen for five minutes before replying.
Who can I tell if my family ignores self-harm?
Tell another safe adult such as a teacher, safeguarding lead, GP, counsellor, youth worker or trusted relative. You deserve support even if one person dismisses it.